Wow, it's been a while since I've been on. I think rather than "catch up," I'll just start from here. We've had a huge weather change over the weekend. Temperatures have dropped 20-30 degrees and its raining and windy. All of a sudden it feels like fall. I love fall. I love the cooler weather, the football, the color. I start coaching again, we have cross country, I have tennis. I like getting back to a schedule of sorts in our household. Sometimes the first few weeks are a little rough, but I keep reminding myself that things will settle into a routine here pretty quickly.

This past weekend MC and I went to Memphis for a cross country meet. It was a twilight meet in the evening. I enjoy (working hard not to overuse the word love) watching the kids run. They are so intent, and working so hard. Watching them race to try and pass just one more runner before the finish line, or to make it through before the clock turns over to another round number. This year I've been taking pictures of the team running. I've decided cross country must be one of the most painful sports out there, you would not believe the looks on the faces of the runners. A few of them have started trying to smile, just because they know I'm taking pictures. During the girls race we had a beautiful sky, and it was fun to watch everyone run under the lights and into the stadium at the end. It was just our second race of the season, and it looks like it should be a good one. Here's to fall and all the fun ahead.

Vacation

After eight days on vacation its good to be home. PM had a two week break before starting summer classes and an internship in College Station this summer. We decided to take advantage of being a homeschool family and go on vacation during his break. MC wanted to go somewhere we had never been, so we headed to Wyoming to the Grand Tetons and Yellowstone National Park. Spring is a little late in coming this year, and they have had record snowfalls this winter, all of this combined to create a rather unusual "summer" vacation. Our pictures of this area are a little unusual. There was snow everywhere. In some places DEEP snow. We have pictures of geysers steaming away next to a snowbank. All in all, very cool. MC and I even made a small snowman, just because we could.

We flew into Salt Lake City and drove up to Jackson, WY. We stayed at a nice hotel in Jackson called the Wyoming Inn. Breakfast was cooked to order each morning, and there were coffee and cookies out in the evenings. We drove up to Grand Tetons National Park the first day. We all loved it. What a beautiful area. There were elk and bison everywhere. We drove the park and everyone enjoyed taking pictures of all the beautiful scenery. We drove to Jenny Lake and trudged through 3 feet of snow for a look at the mostly frozen lake. There was a moose standing by the bridge, so we did get some great pictures for our efforts. The second day we drove through some other areas of the park and took more pictures. We walked out at another lake and noticed we were standing pretty close to the edge. Someone said "be careful you may be standing over the lake there" at about the same time that MC's foot went straight through the snow and ice and confirmed that she was in fact standing in the lake. We saw a few bison calves and enjoyed the town of Jackson. The Mile High Pizza Pie shop was great, and so were Billy's Big Burgers.

Next we drove over to Yellowstone and stayed at the Old Faithful lodge, the oldest log structure still in use (or so they say) in America. It is lovely and does give you a feeling of stepping back in time. Yellowstone was other worldly. To see the steam rising through the woods and scenery is like something out of a sci-fi movie. We watched several small geysers go off and then the next day dutifully watched Old Faithful. She did not disappoint. We had a front row seat and it was fairly amazing. There is beautiful scenery in Yellowstone too including a canyon, several waterfalls and wildlife. After one night at the Old Faithful lodge we moved out to West Yellowstone, MT. A very small town pretty much dependent on the tourists coming to Yellowstone. We drove all the roads that were open and enjoyed time together. One day we set out to spot wildlife and we were not disappointed. It was like being in one of those safari parks you drive through. We saw herds of elk and bison. We saw antelope, bears, big horn sheep, osprey, and black deer. We learned never to eat in a "Bistro" in a town of less than 300.

All in all, we had a great time. Yellowstone was cool and well worth seeing. We all want to go back to Jackson and the Grand Tetons. It was nice to get away and spend time together. Now its back to school, work, and regular routine, which can be nice too.

Rain

When I was younger I loved the rain. It was such a great excuse to just spend the day curled up with a book, or watching movies, or something like that. Lately, I can honestly say, I am very tired of rainy days. I have come to the conclusion that I would not do well in Seattle. We have had a series of rainy days interspersed with one or two sunny days, followed by more rain. It is beautiful and very green, but I miss the sun. I just seem to have a little harder time being positive when it is cold (its 48 degrees outside this morning), gray, and raining. I have to give it to the birds though, there is one outside the window this morning just singing away. I keep thinking "Don't you have a nest somewhere out of this rain?" It is supposed to clear off tomorrow and be more seasonable. The forecast shows a mix of sun and clouds for the next 5 days. Here's hoping they are right!

Life

I have come to a realization....no one's life if easy. How many times do we watch other people thinking "Wow, they seem so happy," or "Man, they really have it together," etc? You know what? No one has it all together. No one's life is easy all the time. Every family, every individual, everyone has issues. Your issues are probably not the same as mine, but they are there. I know friends and family right now who are going through illness, divorce, financial issues, problems with kids, you name it.

I remember distinctly when this hit home. I have a friend who is lovely, and thin. I remember thinking it must be nice to be so thin. I later found out that she is thin because of a cronic illness that incredibly limits what she can eat. It makes it very hard for her to go out to eat anywhere. She deals with it graciously and without complaint, but that is why she is thin. Hmmm, maybe a few extra pounds is not that big of a deal in that context.

No one's life is perfect. We are all just doing the best we can. Some days are easier than others, to be sure. I think we all have some of those wonderful days we would just live in, but that is not what is promised here on earth. Abundant life is promised, but not easy life, not simple life, not happy life. Some days do I think I would trade my issues for someone else's? Absolutely! But I doubt it would help. I think when we face issues here on earth it helps to remember that there is a home waiting for us that is so much better. When life is easy and good I don't really look forward to a heavenly home some day. When the tough times hit, heaven is a place that I can "hang my hat on," it helps me to remember that "this world is not my home, I'm just a passin' through." I still choose to make the most of what I face here, and enjoy life. I love to laugh, and smile, and find the humor in life, it helps me get through. But on the tough days, it is nice to know that this is not all there is, there is something so much better that I cannot even fully comprehend it. That brings a smile to my face, even in the face of my "issues."

"But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ," Philippians 3:20

Thoughts...

This has been a slow, thoughtful week. One of my tennis buddies shared with us that she will not be playing this season due to breast cancer. Her prognosis is great and they caught it very early, but still...She is fun and funny and we will miss her laughter on the courts, this season.

We also have a family friend who will be undergoing a bone marrow transplant today. I've been spending some quiet time in prayer for healing for many people this week. It is humbling and makes so many things seem small.

I have tried to write this post several times this week. I keep getting stuck. Right here. Maybe it is best to turn it over to God, and not say more than he has already said:

Psalm 46

¹ God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
² Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
³ though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging...

⁵ God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at break of day...

¹⁰ He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”

¹¹ The LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.

Spring Break

What a wonderful Spring Break we had. MC and I flew to San Antonio, then spent a week at my parents with PM and some of his friends from college. We had shopping excursions to San Antonio and Bandera, ate out some, had lunch with family in San Antonio, fished, hiked, and generally had a great break. We drove home Sat and Sunday (we had two cars in Texas and one driver, so we brought our truck back to TN). MC and I drove through Fredricksburg, stopped at Wildseed Farms, had lunch at Natty Flatts Smokehouse, and had a lovely visit with my aunts and grandmother before heading on back to TN.

It was really fun to spend time with PM and his friends. It was good to be face to face and have time to just hang out and talk. MC and I had a great day, just the two of us, shopping, meeting family for lunch, and in general just spending a day together. We drove by our old house is San Antonio, and enjoyed seeing it. It is amazing how a week away from the regular routine can be restful, and yet I was so ready to be home by the end of the trip. It was nice to wake up this morning and be back home, back into our regular Monday morning routine, back to the everyday normalcy of life.

When I was visiting with my grandmother and aunt we were talking about our kids in college, where they are heading, what they are looking at doing in the future, etc. My grandmother, who had ten kids, said "Launching kids into life is one of the hardest things in the world. It's much harder than raising them from babies, through school." It is not easy, but I have to say I am enjoying watching as they choose for themselves and grow into what God has waiting for them. It is fun to see them becoming adults. I like who I see both of them becoming.

Tennis

Yesterday I had a tennis clinic. I picked up a racket for the first time three years ago(I think that's right). I had friends who played in high school, but I had never really learned the game. Now I play at least one day a week, pretty much year round. I love it. I was somewhat athletic once upon a time and it is the first time in forever, where I actually get to play a game and compete with other people my age, my level, etc. I love the feel of hitting a really good overhead. I love it when you hit the ball in the "sweet spot;" the twang of the racket in your hand when the contact is just right. I'm not that good, but thankfully at my age there are other people who play about like I do. It is pretty good exercise and I play with a great group of ladies.

League play starts in April. We play in a city league that has matches once a week, for seven weeks beginning next month. It's fun, and really nice to do something that feels so much like hooky. I go out on Thursday morning and usually don't get back until after lunch. No house cleaning, no school, nothing but tennis for that one day. It is a physical respite for this wanna be athlete. The only exercise better than tennis is Zumba...but that's a whole other blog to write. ;-)

Cooking

I like to cook. Several years ago we looked at our monthly budget and realized we were spending an absurd amount of money eating out. Not even eating out at really good places, just the accumulation of all the quick stops added up. We made a concerted effort to limit the eating out. That led to more thoughtful cooking on my part.

I have found that I really enjoy preparing a well cooked meal. At this point there is very little that I won't attempt, at least once. I love looking over the internet for new recipes. I like the Pioneer Woman Cooks (thanks Lindsey for getting me started on that one), the Foodnetwork site (many favorites have come from here), and www.myrecipes.com which is a compilation of recipes from Southern Living, Real Simple, Oxmoore House, Sunset, and a few others. Our newest favorite recipe is Anne Burrell's Lasagna from the Foodnetwork site. I made it the other night when my mom was here. She asked for the recipe at dinner and I told her I'd give her the printed recipe but that I had not followed it exactly. P and C both immediately said "you never follow the recipe, that's nothing new." Hmmm....really? Well when I think about it honestly, they're right. I improvise based on family tastes, ingredients in the pantry, time constraints, you name it. I like to improvise, but improvising is a two edged sword. Improvising in cooking can be great, improvising in life, not so much. Abraham improvised and look at the middle east today! Sometimes I need to curb my tendency to improvise, and remember to stay on the path God had called me to. I have always liked Proverb 3:5-6
" ⁵ Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
⁶ in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight."

I think sometimes though I like to skip over the "submit" part. In order for him to make my path straight, I must submit to him. It's a good reminder.

So I think I will try to do my improvising in the kitchen, and when it comes to life, I'll try to remember who is in control and submit to the "recipe" he has for me.

Doldrums

It's 11 am and it's already, "one of those days." My college student called totally bummed. He received a lower grade than expected on a test he thought he had aced. My better half has been frustrated at work recently and is heading into a rather brutal 6 weeks on his schedule, so not a lot of happy dancing going on there. My in-house student is tired of everything and ready for a break (yeah, me too). Maybe its the weather. Last week we had some beautiful days, but over the weekend we are back to cold rain, gray clouds, and generally blah outside. At least there are some trees starting to bloom and the forsythia is showing its color. It brings hope that sunny skies and warmer temperatures are on the way.

DH and I are heading out for a spring break trip to TX later this week. I cannot wait. With a high here today in the upper 40's, temperatures in the 70's and 80's sounds wonderful. I'm looking forward to some real mexican food and maybe even a few bluebonnets if we're lucky. So for today I will focus on Thursday. I will look forward to being off of regular duty and just enjoy being in the Lone Star State for a week. I think that will help put a smile of my face for the rest of THIS day, and hopefully a few others.

Dog Hair

Our dog is a wonderful chocolate lab named Bailey. She is one of the sweetest dogs I have ever known. She can be remarkably stupid (the day she ate 15 white candles she found in the garage), and incredibly bright (one day she found a portable radio we had lost in the woods at my parents, how did she know that was what we were out looking for?). We love her very much. I just wish she did not shed! We continually joke about teaching her to run the vacuum. Man if we could teach her to do that my house would actually appear fairly clean, but I just don't see that happening.

In reality I guess we're all like that. We offer some incredibly good things, some remarkably stupid, and in the end we all have some sort of "dog hair." Something that others would change about us, that is just part of who we are. We also see it in others. How many times have you thought, "if I could just change X about so-and-so." I am beginning to realize that having life abundantly, as Christ calls us to (The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly. John 10:10), means accepting the things that make us crazy and learning to appreciate the rest. I mean, come on, if I can do it with my dog, surely I can do it with the people in my life too!

Company

I love having company, especially my mom. Unlike 99% of Middle Tennessee my family does not live "in town", my family does not even live in state. Most of our family is in Texas, so company usually means a visit from family. I enjoy the break in the routine. When my mom comes we usually don't do anything out of the ordinary, I just enjoy her company as we grocery shop, run errands, etc. She helps with meals and even does little chores around the house. I know she will be ready to go home on Sunday (she will have been gone for two weeks, one week at a convention, the other with us), but it sure is nice having her here.

Uncertainty

Life is full of uncertainty. It is a time worn cliche, but oh so true. There are the uncertainties that creep up on us, and there are the ones that stare us in the face. The creepers, are easier for me than those that stare at me. I get very impatient with the ones staring me in the face. Often I feel like shouting "just resolve already!" I do better when I just relax, and hand it all over to God, but many times that is easier said than done. I also have a tendency to hand it over to God, but snatch it right back so I can "think on it", aka perseverate on it, some more. I am beginning to realize, and maybe even accept, that it does not matter how much I "think on it", things will only resolve it God's time, not mine. So today, I am praying for God to resolve my current uncertainty, and for me to accept his time frame. It sounds so easy when I write it out.

When I was house hunting in Brentwood, for the third time, by myself, one of my kids (who was 12 at the time), sent me a song in an email. The words to the song are from Philipians 4
"And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus." Phil 4:19
It is no less true today. As this week's uncertainty stares me in the face, I think it is time to perseverate on this verse, in place of my own desire for resolution.

Cleaning House

We have company coming this week. I enjoy having company, especially my mom, who is the company coming this week. We have had a busy week, with activities, illness, etc. I have not spent much time cleaning. I have the major stuff done, clean sheets on the guest bed, I'll clean the bathroom later today, maybe even vacuum the family room. You know what? My mom isn't coming to see how clean my house is. She is coming to spend time with me and my family. Many years ago a good friend pointed out something very important to me. She asked me "Lezlae, do you want Celeste running around cleaning like crazy every time you visit her when she is grown?" I have thought about this often. It's a good reminder that we are always teaching.

Spring?

This week's weather has been glorious. After weeks of gray, cold, even snowy weather it has been warm, sunny and beautiful the last few days. This morning there is a symphony of birdsong outside. It feels like spring. Spring, the season of renewal, the season of hope. Here in Middle Tn it is a season of color. I am sure we have a few days or even weeks of chilly temperatures ahead, but right now it feels like SPRING.

¹¹For, lo, the winter is past,
the rain is over and gone;
¹²The flowers appear on the earth;
the time of the singing of birds is come
Song of Solomon 2:1-12

Motivation

I need to get moving this morning. I need to make a grocery run, get the guest room ready, write a swim practice for today, exercise. It's one of those days. Nothing is that grueling, nothing is overwhelming, its just that some days the sum of the whole is uninspiring. We've all been here before, will probably be here again. So right now I'm drinking another cup of coffee (with some cookies for breakfast) thinking about how to tackle the day. Just writing it out makes me laugh a little. I mean, good grief, get over it girl. Here in a few minutes I'll get going, and at the end of the day I'll actually have a sense of accomplishment (especially if I get all of it done), but for this moment, I think I'll just drink my coffee and listen to the birds outside my window for a few more moments.


As an update from an earlier post, PM has the flu. The campus clinic gave him some meds and he is recovering, slowly.

Cookies for Breakfast

This morning I had cookies for breakfast. This always makes me feel a tiny bit guilty, but it also makes me smile. I baked oatmeal, white chocolate chip, craisin cookies yesterday for Valentine's day. They are excellent with coffee for breakfast. There is an old Bill Cosby skit where he justifies feeding his kids chocolate cake for breakfast. He tells his wife "it has eggs, milk, butter, that's what we eat for breakfast anyway." I can especially do this with cookies. Oatmeal, fruit, eggs, sounds like breakfast to me. There is no profound analogy here. Just a moment to stop and enjoy the simple things in life...like cookies for breakfast.

Far Away

Some days I do not like living 14 hours away from College Station, TX. Today is one of those days. PM loves A&M, and so do I. I enjoyed my years there immensely. I am loving seeing him flourish there and enjoy many of the same things I did. Today my college kid is sick. He is running a fever and has a headache. Today I wish I could run over and check on him. Make sure he is okay, and be a mother to him.

Probably would not feel as strongly about this, but last Friday a student at the university died from meningitis. So now I sit and wait to hear from him, while he goes to the health clinic for a screening. Saying some prayers, trying to let go, and wishing I was not quite so far away.

Coaching

I love coaching. I always have. I started coaching a little over ten years ago. The first team I coached was one of PM's basketball teams. We had signed up to play YMCA basketball. We were assigned a team, and had our first team meeting. At that team meeting parents were informed that we would have to decide among ourselves who would be the coach for this bunch of 5-6 year old boys. I being the only parent with actual basketball experience (I played in high school), and a willingness to take it on became the coach. We had a pretty good season, and I learned many things that first year. One of the things I remember the most was a coach from one of the teams teaching me that winning is not nearly as important as letting every player on the team score a basket during the season. When you are 5 or 6, scoring a basket makes a big impression.


Through the years I have coached or helped coach many teams. Mainly basketball, a few soccer (very early on), and currently swimming. Swimming? Yeah, swimming. I never swam in high school. The most I did was a few years of summer league. My qualifications as a swim coach again stemmed from filling a need for a warm body to step up and help out. PM swam competitively from age 9 to 18. If you have a swimmer you know that's a lot of hours at the pool.


I started helping out on deck three years ago. I love it. I love watching swimmers work to achieve their personal goals. The kids we train (I am an assistant coach) are not year 'round swimmers. They swim three days a week. This is not much by swimming standards. I love wet hugs or high fives from swimmers who have just achieved a cut they were striving for. I like seeing the nervous energy behind the starting blocks translated into a swim they didn't know they were capable of. I enjoy the smiles and joy of a relay team that has just realized they have made it back to swim in finals for the very first time. There are also disappointments, and helping swimmers to learn to deal with those is part of it too.


We are headed out to the high school state championship swim meet today. It is the first time I have gone anywhere coaching without one of my own kids participating. I am actually looking forward to it. I will be able to go, and just coach. It should be an interesting experience.

Snow

Snow is in the forecast, again. I love snow. It's pretty, somewhat peaceful, and here in Middle Tennessee it doesn't usually last very long. We have had snow here almost every week since Christmas. I still think its pretty, but this week I could do without it. The swim team I help coach is headed to Knoxville for the state championship meet tomorrow. We are scheduled to warm up at the UT pool at 6 pm tomorrow night. In order to do that we will have to travel across the Cumberland Plateau, one of the areas forecast for the greatest snow accumulation. Ugh. I love snow, when I don't have to travel 150 miles in it.

Burdens

The last few weeks have been full of ups and downs (as most weeks in everyone's lives are!) There have been a few especially rough days. I am incredibly thankful for friends willing to share what burdens my heart, in prayer. I am also learning to truly turn things over to God. I am finding freedom in acknowledging that I cannot always control circumstances around me, or the people around me. I can turn my cares and burdens over to Christ and live a life of joy through difficult days. I tend to have an innately positive outlook. When I get bogged down, I REALLY get bogged down. I function so much better when I allow God to take it all, and enjoy the here and now. He is showing me that trusting in Him is so much better than trying to "fix" it myself.

In the days and weeks ahead, I am sure that I will forget this from time to time. Isn't it good to know that He knows this about us. He is always there to take our burdens, we have only to hand them over. A long time ago I heard a radio devotional. It had a great impact. Whenever I think of it I am instantly back in that car, in that moment hearing the words. I don't remember the exact phrasing but it was something like this:

"Good Morning, this is God. Thank you for bringing your problems and cares to me. I will take care of them for you. No, I really don't need your help."

This is a message I need to hear occasionally. When I hand my problems over to God, they are his. I need to let them go and live the joy of a life of freedom in Christ. The first verse to the worship song "Here in this Place" has been running through my head all morning. The words are:
Lay your burden down
Every care you carry,
And come to the table of grace,
For there is mercy.
Come just as you are,
We are all unworthy
To enter the presence of God
For He is holy.

The chorus is viewed as refering to church, but as I read over it, I think it is our hearts, not church:
Lift up your heart, lift up your hands,
Fall on your knees and pray;
For the King of kings and the love He brings
Is here in this place.
We raise our voices, raise our song,
We offer Him our praise;
For the King of kings and the joy He brings
Is here, He is here in this place.

May he be in your heart today!